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08 February 2011 @ 12:22 am
this is really whatever is coming up in my mind, i like being impulsive (sometimes)  
So, for the past half an hour or so, I've been laughing barfing at the nauseating repulsiveness that I used to write in my very first lj (aww baby, I know). BUT STILL. I was such a obnoxious preteen, complaining about (mostly unreasonable) shit that I could probably just walk by and brush my shoulders at, or drooling over how ~hawt~ I though Pete Wentz was. Seriously, I wish I could go back in time and punch myself in the face :/

But hey, I'll give you the link for your enjoyment: http://cheapteacups.livejournal.com/

I guess in a way I have grown up quite a bit in the last 5-6 years since my freshmen year. I really can't grasp the fact that it's been that long since, I feel like it was just yesterday walking through the doors of that hell hole, smelling the fresh (but not really) scent of overrated cliches and petty drama that stirs about in an all-girl environment. Thank fucking god I am out of there. I really don't understand why people are is still holding on to their precious ~high school years~. I honestly wanted nothing but to grab my things and run as fast as I could out of there. But hey, no one else was as ~smart~ as I was right? :):):):))))))))))))))))))))))) lol jkz. But really, I went to school with a lot of retards and social climbers. No one used their brains (maybe in another way in a sense..... OH GOD), mostly people only cared about who liked who or who was better than who. I don't know, and the people that even remotely liked anything that was ~tasteful~ knew shit all about it. Everyone was flat, no one had personality. Well, except the selected few, and I guess there's always going to be only a handful of these kinds in any place. But I guess you all get the jist of my treacherous high school years.

Anyway, most of the time I wish I surrounded myself with people who were more cultured or at least didn't think that the only form of entertainment and casuality was to go out clubbing to drinking. I mean, I'm not a party pooper about it, I think it's just as fun as the next person would, I really just don't want to do it every fucking weekend. They're all carbon copies of every other 19 year old college student. I want something different, but I don't know what. I guess this is why I separate myself from everyone- like any other person, I tend to separate myself from things that I don't really fit into. I'd rather be alone, or at least with Adam. Mostly because he is the only person that understands me- and I mean really understands me. I don't know, I love my friends to death, but I guess I want change in a sense.

Ps. I have school at 9am tomorrow, BUT I DON'T FEEL LIKE SLEEPING YET THO UGH KILL ME PLZ